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About Me Member Romantic Writer Justin Burkett19/Male/United States Recent Activity Deviant for 3 Years
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Coming Undone, My Angel

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My Apology

Thu Apr 30, 2009, 1:08 PM
  • Mood: Distressed
  • Listening to: Pages - There for Tomorrow
  • Reading: World War Z
  • Watching: Mythbusters
  • Playing: Star Ocean 4 The Last Hope
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-Blog-
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To those that read this, or pay any attention to me. Anyone who's ever called me a friend, or bitterly hates me right now.

I have no excuse for the actions I have had since this January, and you have all rights to hate me as you do, if you do. But this is my apology, to everything, for the scum I have been to those around me, and to those I have hurt. I've made mistakes, and spent the past few months letting the rot me from the inside out over all the pain I've caused. I never really slept, or ate, just let things tear me apart, until the point I broke down and cried constantly.

Part of me died.

I took everything I had, and destroyed it, and spent since January rotting in this pile of my own sorrow trying to count the bricks on the ground where I went wrong. Because this was ALL of my fault, every broken heart, was MY fault, and when asked by people why I'm always blaming myself, or being so hard on myself these past few months, its the pain I caused, and anger towards me, made me realize I HAD to place this burden on me, HOW COULD I BE HAPPY, with someone I love hurting.

So this is me, exposing myself to everyone.

I'm sorry for the things I have done, and I am trying my best to change, to become who I was, when I was happy. Time spent these few months made me realize what is important to me, and who is important to me.

Some of you will look at this, and probably pass it by like I'm just trying to get some self pity, and half assed attempt to apologize. Oh god no, I know what I did was wrong, and I'm going to spend the rest of my life fixing the wrongs I have done, even if it was only a short time period, I fucked up beyond words can describe.

But this is for me, and for anyone willing to see I'm not that person.

And to Brittany, thank you for everything you've done. You truly make this entire life of mine, that I don't deserve, better. I'm sorry I wasn't better for you then, and I had to hurt you so much, and hurt myself so much, to find out what was wrong. And now that I've learned from that, I'm going to show you that I can do better.

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Youmacon
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I'm still going to Youmacon this year, I'm planning to rent the room soon. If ANYONE would like to crash in my room, I'm taking people in with me. Nathaniel, Ash, you guys are welcome into my room. But I call dibs on the bed, anyone coming must bring their own stuff to sleep on. And donate to the "Help an Asian Cash Fund" xD






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~RL Friends~
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:icongenchan::iconkanki-kitty::iconniifonron:

~Online Friends~
:iconhappytrap:

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Devious Info

  • Current Residence: Somewhere between here and there
  • deviantWEAR sizing preference: Small
  • Interests: Manga, Anime, Human Anatomy, Psychology
  • Favourite movie: A Beautiful Mind
  • Favourite band or musician: New World Revolution is kinda epic right now!
  • Favourite genre of music: Any and all music is amazing.
  • Favourite artist: Anyone who can paint my soul.
  • Favourite poet or writer: Edgar Allen Poe
  • Favourite photographer: Draggor Lecanth
  • Operating System: Windows Vista
  • MP3 player of choice: Zune! ^-^
  • Shell of choice: Turtle Shell
  • Skin of choice: Your mothers
  • Favourite game: Chrono Cross, Chrono Trigger, Megaman Legends Series
  • Favourite gaming platform: Playstation Portable
  • Favourite cartoon character: Yusuke Urameshi and Spike Spiegel
  • Personal Quote: "Even if I haven't grown an inch since that day, I can't let my heart stay stunted.&q

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Comments


:iconkissingplz: {Thank you for the favourite!!] \(*0*)/!!
I really appreciate it~!! ♥♥♥

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( ゜Д゜)ノ { Welcome to S E I J I land! ♡ )
thanks for the fave

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If you like Yaoi fan fics click here [link]
"I said...I thought....you was......a...toad"
thanks for the favorite =P

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A siren from the deep came to me
Sang my name my longing
Still I write my songs about that dream of mine
Worth everything I may ever be

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Warning: Windows failed due to general failure.
Aww, you added my shamelessly vain self-photography to your favourites. =3

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Art has a right to be shocking
Well, arent we a happy little clusterfuck?
Yup! Cause you are pretty darn...well pretty. :P

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-What kind of love and dream await you around the next corner? Have faith in tomorrow and live it your way...-
hey thanks for the watch

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If you like Yaoi fan fics click here [link]
"I said...I thought....you was......a...toad"
No problem, your art is great!

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-What kind of love and dream await you around the next corner? Have faith in tomorrow and live it your way...-
glad you like it,but I cant draw so I write. I am pretty good at that.

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If you like Yaoi fan fics click here [link]
"I said...I thought....you was......a...toad"
Thanks ^^

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...Here with you, princess

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Tidus902000 [Old Version] - [link]
thanx for the fav :giggle:

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my photo account -> ~Zhrain

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